A Modern Fairytale
by Twinstar
Summary: Angel comes back to Sunnydale to refocus on his "life" and realizes that Buffy is the key to his redemption.
1. Coming Up For Air

COMING UP FOR AIR

COMING UP FOR AIR

Written by Twinstar

Disclaimer:All characters belong to Joss.

Angel has been battling his inner demon for hundreds of years.He has been of the winning side until now and only one person can save him.

This story is in Angel's POV

Please send feedback I live for the stuff at: twinstar_dust@hotmail .com

Enjoy!

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I'm drowning and I can't seem to do anything about it.I think I have gotten my inner demons licked.And this happens…

I have lost control.I have alienated myself from the people that care about me.I have pushed them away that they do not want anything to do with me.I am a loner once more.

I have crossed that delicate balance between good and evil.I do not know if I can ever return to my former existence.I have lost my purpose, my sense of duty and most of all that little part of me that you still can call human.I have done things that my old self would never have comprehended.I am turning into a thing that I originally came to Los Angeles to help…a lost soul.

It all started when she came back into my "Life".The beauty that started my path into destruction, my sire Darla, came back into my realm of existence.I thought I killed her a few years ago when she looked for me in Sunnydale.I staked her though her "heart" myself.I saw her body turn into dust before my very eyes.Then one day I started to have dreams that robbed me of my sanity.I didn't know where reality began and where it ended.I lost strength and slowly the dreams controlled me.They were always the same, Darla would visit me and I would be seduced back to her own world.A world that I lived in for over a hundred years, before I was cursed with a soul.It puzzled me that after all this time I would be thinking of her.All my questions were answered when I saw her in walking in the sun.

For some reason the law firm Wolfram and Hart brought her back from the dead and she was human.She became my obsession I hunted her as if she was my prey.I wanted to connect with her because at long last there was someone on earth that felt want I feel.The burden of horrendous guilt because of what you have done in the past.When I received my soul I remembered all the deaths, tortures and unspeakable crimes I committed against humanity.Darla is human now and she has a soul but she also remembers her life as a vampire.She is like me cursed with the memories of past sins.

I thought I could save her from herself.Teach her what has taken me years to understand, control and accept.I didn't have anyone to show me the way but she would have me so her transition wouldn't be as painful.But at the end I lost her.I was powerless to stop what Wolfram and Hart had planned all along.Darla was turned back into a vampire ironically by my childe, Drusilla.When Darla lost her soul again, in a way I lost part of mine as well.

Now I am a walking shell of my former self.I am alone and I can feel I'm sinking into an abyss of eternal damnation.I have lost my centre, my purpose, and my light.I need to gain back that "something" that I have lost. 

The only thing that can save me is my beloved.But how can I go back to her and ask her to save me when I walked away from her?I thought I was saving her from a lifetime of pain and heartache.I tried to do the only noble thing I have ever done in my "life".I let her go so that she could be free to live a "normal" life.As much as

a normal life a Slayer could have.She didn't need me; a vampire with a soul to complicate her already complicated life.I need my other half my soul mate I need Buffy…

I feel like a hypocrite.I'm the one that walked away from her and now I want her back in my life.When I left Sunnydale I would never have imagined that I would go back with less then I left with.I was on track; I even got a glimpse of a future when I would be human again.I was so happy with my beloved and I was striving for that goal.I was in search for my redemption and I finally got an inkling of how I was to achieve it.I believed that I finally realized my place on earth.To save those who couldn't save themselves.By saving souls, I was working on trying to redeem myself for all the wrongs committed in the past.And now I am one of my own cases.I am drowning and I do not know how to swim.

I make up my mind.I get into my car and drive, my destination, Sunnydale.I don't care if I'll be like a stray puppy with his tail between his legs.I need my sunshine and I need her comfort.I want to feel her arms around me.I want to feel whole again…

I'm here and I wait.I cannot seem to move any muscles in my body.I am still in my car. I slowly open my door and step out onto the pavement.I see the tree beside Buffy's window.I remember all the times I climbed that tree to get into her bedroom.Oh the memories flood back into my brain.I was so happy; when I look back I had everything I wanted in my "life".I threw it all away.How can I be so stupid to not realise that Buffy, is my world?The very moment I first saw Buffy coming down her school steps, the very day she learned that she was the Slayer she became my purpose.She is my sunlight.

I stay in the shadows I cannot gather the courage.She is not even home because the house is in darkness.I stand there in the shadow of the branches for what seems like eternity.I can hear the slow ticking of my watch as time passes.I rake my right hand through my hair and then put my hands into the pockets of my duster coat.I'm about to turn around and go back into my car and drive away…

I hear a noise behind me and I quickly turn around.

"Angel…Angel is that you?" It's her; her voice is that of a heavenly being.My head slowly comes up and my brooding eyes meet hers that are like shining orbs.

"Buffy…I'm home…if you will have me?"

I can see the conflict in her eyes.The inner struggle she is experiencing that I am back in her life.I had caused her pain when I left her, when I gave up on us.I stay rooted to the spot, my whole body tense.I am waiting…

"Come…" I run to her and I hold her tight in my arms.I never want to let go.I breathe the scent of her and whisper in her ear "My life…and my hope."

All at once I know I'll be all right.I am back on the road to my salvation.Buffy IS my heart and soul.I look up into the night sky and I feel a weight lifting off my chest, like as if I'm finally coming up for air.

THE-END


	2. Road To Forgiveness

# THE ROAD TO FORGIVENESS

Written by Twinstar

Disclaimer:All characters belong to Joss.

I dedicate this to Sara and Ryan because they asked for more.This is the sequel to 'Coming Up For Air'.

Angel needs help getting back on track and Buffy is the only person that can help him but will she?

Buffy's POV.The episode "The Body" does not happen. 

Please e-mail me feedback I beg you at:

[Twinstar_dust@hotmail.com][1]

Enjoy!

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The night started off like any other night.I'm out on patrol armed only with Mr.Pointy.It was no biggie.I dusted off several vamps with no problem.I was headed back home when I spotted the unexpected lurking behind the tree below my bedroom window.I can't believe my eyes, the last time we saw each other we agreed to keep out of each other's way.But there he was in all his brooding glory.Angel was back in town.

"Angel…Angel is that you?"

He turns around in a flash once he hears my voice.He meets my gaze and at once I sensed that something was amiss.We stare at each other for what seemed like forever.He seemed to be searching for words to say.He was never a very vocal man but even for him this long pregnant pause was out of the ordinary.Then he finally says the words that grips my heart and leaves me grasping for air.

"Buffy…I am home…if you will have me."

Oh my gosh, I have dreamed of Angel coming back to me.But now that it has become reality, I do not know what to do.When he left me two years ago I was heartbroken.I just wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out.He was my 'everything', my soul mate, and my beloved.He knew that he meant the world to me.No matter what obstacles we faced I had my eyes open wide and I knew what I was getting into.Okay I really didn't know what I was getting into, but we loved each and that's all that mattered.He didn't even say good-bye, we just looked at each other from afar and he just turned his back and walked away.

The only thing I can say is, "Come."Once that word passes my lips Angel rushes towards me and holds me in his arms.This show of emotion has rocked my centre and the only thing I could do was to hug tight.He whispers into my ear, "My life…and my hope." 

My mind and body are in total shock.All the emotions come flooding in and I stiffen in his embrace.He doesn't seem to notice my withdrawal because he's so caught up in his own feelings over our reunion.

Getting on with my life after he left was the hardest thing that I have ever done but I did get on with my life…

"Buffy…Buffy what is going on here?"

Angel and I are so preoccupied with each other that I forget that I have someone accompanying me on my patrols lately.The sudden question coming from the darkness brings me back to present day.I wake up from my dream-like state and push away from Angel's embrace.The voice belongs to Riley and he is my boy friend…

"Umm…Riley it seems… that Angel is back in Sunnydale… to stay." I awkwardly stammer out.

How lame can I get?Well that was the best thing I could come up with in such a short amount of time.What was I suppose to say?"Oh sorry Riley boy but the love of my life is back in the picture, it was fun while it lasted.You can stick a finger in the light socket now.See ya."

I glance over to look at Angel's face to see how he reacted to Riley's presence.As usual he has that non-expressional look on his face.But I looked into his eyes and I could see the pain.We always had a connection with each other.When everyone else saw the unemotional Angel, I saw an Angel with his soul crying out for a connection.He has something to say to me and it's important.I have a feeling his very "life" depends on it.

I go over to Riley and as calming and vague as possible I try to explain to him that Angel needs me and that I have to go to him.

"Riley…I know this is hard to take.Now that you know the history between Angel and I but...you have to trust me. 

"I do Buffy I trust you but I do not trust him..."

"Well you trusting me must be enough.Angel needs some time alone with me.I have to be with him can you understand?"

"Well I do not understand, after all he left you with no say and here you are welcoming him with open arms.But as I said before I trust you.Nite and I'll talk to you later."

Riley then kisses me good-bye but I got the distinct feeling that it was all for Angel's benefit.He wanted to let Angel know that I was his girl and not Angel's anymore. 

As Riley walks away I get a queasy feeling in my stomach.Yes he trusts me being with Angel but do I trust myself?

"Now that's what I call awkward," Angel says to break the silence.

"Yes it was.I have a feeling you really need to talk.You still own the mansion maybe we should go there for privacy?"

I take his hand in mine and it feels so natural.This is where I belong this is home.No matter what happened in the past it's not relevant anymore.Yes I am afraid to get hurt again but at the same time I know what it's like not to be with him.It's like the sun cannot be the sun without the moon.

I do not know what the future has in store for us and it is complicated (with Riley and all) but it will be worth it in the end.We slowly walk towards his house and onto the road to forgiveness.

To be continued.

   [1]: mailto:Twinstar_dust@hotmail.com



	3. To Everything...There Is A Season

# TO EVERYTHING…THERE IS A SEASON

Written by Twinstar

Disclaimer: Everyone belongs to Joss.

Angel realizes that Buffy IS his 'life' but there's the little matter of past hurts and a guy named Riley to get over.

This has unexpectedly turned into a series so this takes place after "The Road To Forgiveness"

This is both Angel and Buffy's POV.Buffy's written in italic.

_ _

This is dedicated to all those who wanted more to the story.Thanks for the support.

Feed back I NEED feed back at [twinstar_dust@hotmail.com][1]

Enjoy!

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There is silence…

# Once we reached the mansion it's the quite that you can hear a pin drop.On the trip back to Sunnydale from LA I rehearsed what I was going to say to Buffy.Now when I look at her my mind is in total chaos.What am I suppose to say to her?She has gone on with her life, just like I told her to.I told her to live a 'normal' life but I guess I never really thought a boyfriend would enter in the picture.Who was I kidding?

# 

# _I*He is here. He is really here. I still can't believe it.The last time we saw each other it wasn't very pleasant.I said really mean things to him.I wanted to hurt him as much as he hurt me when he left without any discussion much less a word.__I told him I found someone who I loved, that I put my feelings about him behind me.What a lie.All the time I spent with Riley I never said the L word.In my gut I know that Riley knows that I'll never love him like I loved Angel.I'm kidding myself again how much I love Angel. *I/_

# I wonder what she is thinking. We are still sitting here in silence.I better go and say something before I lose the courage to tell her the truth.It's funny I have faced every evil force without any hesitation or fear but just the thought of Buffy rejecting me is terrifying.

# 

# "Buffy I know this is a lot to process right now…my coming back to your life wasn't planned.I never wanted to disrupt your life again but I had to come.Things have happened to me this last couple of months.I feel as if I'm losing myself and becoming Angelus once more."

# "You didn't…"

"No no nothing like that.I could never…"

"Then what happened?The first time I looked into your eyes back there at my house I could tell something was different."

"Darla came back that's what happened.This law firm that deals with demons brought her back to life.She was human Buffy.She was what I am striving for.I felt connected to her some how.I think it was because for once there was someone out there who knew how it felt like to have a soul, but also knew what total evil felt like as well.If one didn't come to terms with all the guilt it can rip you apart and drive you insane.I wanted to save her.We had things in common and I was drawn to her and that was my downfall."

"What do Cory and Wes feel about this…attraction?"

"That's the thing.They knew… they knew it wasn't good for my soul but I didn't pay attention until it was too late Darla was like an obsession that I couldn't shake.At the end I fired the ones that were the closest to me because I didn't want to hear that I was wrong."

Now for the hard part, how am I to tell her all the things I did?She probably still remembers my exploits when I became Angelus.I don't want to dread up all the crimes I did and all the pain and heartache I put her and her friends through.But that's what I have to do.All the things I did after Darla was unwillingly turned back into a vampire were characteristics of Angelus.

_I*Wow this is serious.I never have seen Angel so unravelled before.Darla back in his life is definitely not a good sign.She is the only thing that I can't measure up against.Face it; she and Angel have a history that I can't compete with.She's the one that introduced him to the evil ways, his sire; they were lovers for hundreds of years. No wonder Cory and Wes tried to talk sense into him.They knew that being with Darla would only bring trouble.They both know how it would be like if Angelus ever reappeared onto the scene…Mayhem. *i/_

_ _

# "Um Angel are you okay?Did something happen?"

_ _

_"_Yes something happened and I slowly started losing pieces of my soul.I wanted to save her but at the end I was powerless to stop the plans that Wolfram and Hart had all along.I finally convinced Darla that being human with a soul was another chance at life.Then it was brutally taken away from her.The firm hired Drusilla to turn her back into a vampire and I was made to watch."

"That must have been terrible for you.To watch losing her after you worked so hard to save her."

"It questioned my very purpose.I was helping lost souls to gain my redemption and for what? To lose them to evil again and it made me doubt in my very existence.I never win I never really win.What is it all for if I never really accomplish anything?

Then I really lost it.When Darla lost her soul I felt I lost a part of my soul too.I wanted vengeance and I was willing to do anything to get it.Do you understand?I didn't care about what was right or wrong anymore.I was losing the little part of me that was human.In hindsight, I believe that was what Wolfram and Hart's agenda was all along.Not to have Darla evil but me…They wanted Angelus.And I fell for it hook, line and sinker."

"Angel you just did what you always do.You tried to save a lost soul."

"And in the process I lost mine"

Now can I tell her that I came back because I realized that she's my salvation?I want her back, all of her.Do I have the right to turn her world upside down again?

_I*Why did he come back?Why is he here?Is he here for me?Oh I wish he came back for me.Nothing has changed over the years.He is still my beloved.No matter how I tried to forget him he really never left.I tried the normal thing, I got a 'normal' boyfriend but it never was real.The only real thing is Angel and we being together.i/_

_ _

"I don't have the right to ask this but can we start all over again.I know you are with someone.I want you in my life; I need you in my life.Even if it means to just be your friend," says Angel invading Buffy's thoughts.

"I want you to be in my life too but nothing has changed.You still have that happiness clause and whenever we are with each other our feelings are volatile."

"Actually there is something more important and it's the very reason why I am here now.When I was on the end of my rope.When I figured out my mistakes.I knew I couldn't just get back what I had.I have to earn it and want it back.The only thoughts I had were of you and how you complete me.Years ago when I saw you for the first time that's when I realized my purpose and you are still that purpose.In short you are my salvation."

_I*I never knew we had a higher connection with each other.I just thought we were like those tragic couples in stories that have to stay apart due to circumstances.We are destined to be with one another and nothing can keep us apart, even gypsy clauses.Angel and I are soul mates.*i/_

_ _

There I said it and for some reason Buffy doesn't seem stunned with the revelation.She actually looks relieved.Sometime during our conversation we have moved towards the sofa.We are sitting intimately and my arm is draped across her shoulder.Buffy's head is resting against my chest and I have not felt 'at home' for the longest time, until now.

"Angel I have a confession.The situation with Riley was very awkward earlier and I felt responsible.I hate to think like this but it has to be said.I'm with Riley just for the sake that I'm with Riley; do you know what I mean?At the time I met him, I was lonely for you and your words haunted my thoughts.You wanted me to have a 'normal life', I tried it and it didn't work.All this time I never said the L word to him because all along my heart belonged to someone else already.I'm tired of denying it, it's you and it's always been you.I have a feeling it will always be you for eternity."

"We tried staying apart but it has made us miserable even to the point that I lost my purpose, my centre.I was wrong we do belong together.I need you in my life so that I can find my soul again…Please will you have me?"

_I*I have him back and I'm never going to let him go again.He needs me and in return I need him.We are each other's destiny.All the hurt in the past, are forgiven and we have to forge a new life with one another.Who would of every though a Slayer and a vampire soul mates, it reminds me of the sun and moon.Both so different that they take turns ruling the sky but one cannot exist without the other.*i/_

_ _

I give her shoulder a squeeze.It was hard coming back to her feeling so vulnerable and needing her help, but I'm glad I did.We can make this work and all our past hurts have made us stronger.We now know that our bond cannot be broken and in time we will heal.I can feel myself getting stronger just being with my beloved again.I will never leave.Yes we have issues to work out but we can handle anything…together.

We look into each other's eyes and we find each other's essence.We are slowly forgiving each other for past mistakes and healing each other's pain.Our lips are drawn to touch and we know it's right, it feels like heaven, our kiss is a promise to a new future.To everything there is a season… and now it's for love.

IS IT THE-END TO A FAIRY TALE?NOT QUITE THE PART WHERE DREAMS COME TRUE IS NEXT. 

__

   [1]: mailto:twinstar_dust@hotmail.com



	4. Trust Me

# TRUST ME

Written by Twinstar

Disclaimer:As usual the characters belong to Joss not me.

This takes place after "To Everything…There Is a Season"

Angel and Buffy had their heart to heart talk.They still have a lot of baggage to get over but they are willing to make things work again.Now they just have to convince their friends.

This story is in Angel and Buffy's POV.Angel's thoughts are in *italics.

Dedicated to all those who gave me wonderful feed back.Thanks Alyssa, Sara, Erinne and Ryan for the idea.

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The sun is just peaking through some clouds and casting a weak sunbeam through the cracks of the heavy velvet curtains.The two lovers are sleeping peacefully on the couch where they drifted off to sleep in the wee hours of the morning…

I slowly open my eyes and rub them with my free hand.My other had is pinned by a heavy object.My vision gets clearer and I look into the face of an angel, my Angel.So I wasn't dreaming last night.It really happened, he came back into my life to stay and I welcomed him.I just wanted to stare at his face for the rest of my life but my hand that was pinned between Angel and the couch was numb.I guess we fell asleep in each other's arms while we were talking the night before.I slowly caress his face and he slowly smiles and playfully bites my finger. 

"Good morning sleepy head" I whisper into his ear.

"Morning Buffy.I wish I could always wake up like this.I would be in heaven," Angel sleepily answers.

"I gotta go.I badly want to stay but I already stayed too long."

"Why don't you tidy yourself up first so that people don't think the worst."

"Good idea…Angel can you stay out of sight until I figure a way to break the news of your return.I need to speak to Riley as well. I don't know how to tell him without hurting him.It might take some time."

"I have to admit I don't like the idea of you being with him but I do understand."

"I'll try to come back tonight."

"Till then"

_ _

I'm actually humming.I never hum.I'm walking home and I'm on cloud nine.I can't help it but I have the goofiest grin on my face.I better calm down before I spill the beans to the gang before I tell Riley.I hate that I have to tell him about Angel but I think he has always known that he's not my love of my life.I do love him, that's why I was with him, but I am not in love with him.I never said the word 'I love you' no matter how much he said them to me.I feel so guilty but I think at the time I needed him.I was alone and after the Parker fiasco, I needed an anchor.I'm not a needy person but I just wanted something normal for a while, something to keep grounded.I don't want Riley to think I used him but in reality I did.Man, I don't want to feel so happy but I still can't believe it, Angel's back in my life.

"Mom, I'm home"

"You were out pretty late.Riley has been phoning here non-stop, he seems worried about you?Is there anything you should be telling me?"

"No…mom everything is fine. What did he say?"

"Nothing, just something in his voice."

"I'll call him but first I need to take a shower and change my clothes."

Knock Knock

"Angel I know you are in there!" Riley yelling and pounding on the door and there was no answer.

Riley placed his hand on the doorknob and found that it was open.

"Go figure, vamps don't use locks"

He slowly walks inside and it's dim, he takes a stake from under his jacket, ready to strike.

"Hey Finn, hasn't anyone taught you any manners.You are supposed to be invited before you go into someone's house."

Angel walks out of the shadows and moves right behind Riley without making a noise.

Riley jumped out of fright "Man…you you scared me.Are all vamps so ssneaky."

"You better train some more.If this is how you military men do reconnaissance you are fresh bait."

*What was Buffy thinking when she replaced me with him?Yes I wanted her to have a chance with a normal life, but with this bumbling idiot?He was in her bed and he was apart of her life.Did he make her smile, laugh, and cry out with ecstasy?I can't blame her, she did what I told her to do, go on with her life. *

"I don't need your advice Angel.Is Buffy here?"

"No"

"Don't lie to me she didn't come home last night."

"She is not here.You can take a look if you want to but she just left…to freshen up."

"Why are you back here?Buffy doesn't need you.WE do not need you here."

"I had to come and boy I'm here to stay." 

"Like hell you are.I bet Buf was the first person to tell you to leave."

"Actually she agreed that I should stay."

"What!She is leaving me…isn't she?I can give her everything.I can hold her in my warm arms and together we can express the true meaning of love."

# "Think about it.Has she actually said the words to you?"

"No, no okay are you happy."

** **

*Oh yes I am.She never said the words 'I love you' to him.She saved those words for me.Only me and I'll never let her go again.She is my sunlight who will show me the way out of the dark and to true happiness* 

"She has said the words to me…"

"Angel what do you have to offer her?You guys can't even be together because of the clause.You can't do that to her.Hell you are not even human."

"She knows all this but she still wants to be with me.Our love has surpassed that existence, we are two of a whole, and we are soul mates."

"No! I can't let you.I won't let you!"Riley maddened with rage, strikes Angel with the stake that he has clenched in his hand.

Angel surprised by the attack would have gotten seriously hurt if it wasn't for his vampire reflexes.The stake just glazed his arm and a small gash is slowly weeping out blood.No matter how badly Angel wants to fight, he doesn't make a move.Riley is fuelled by anger and hurt by the news that Buffy's going to leave him. He is taking that rage out on Angel and is relentless.Angel is not counter attacking but just trying to stay clear of Riley's wrath.It happened so fast that even to Angel it wasn't clear what had happen.For some reason Riley got impaled by the very stake he was using against Angel…

"Riley, don't move, you are making the wound worse.Just stay still I'll call for help."

"In a way…this is poetic justice.I won't be able to be with her but neither will you…Do you think that she will believe that you didn't mean to kill me?She will blame you…and in the end I win…" With his dying breath Riley curses Angel to hell.

"Nooo!"

* Buffy will not believe me.Our bond's still fragile.We still have a long road to forgiveness.She will not understand.She will blame me.How can this happen?I didn't even lay a finger on him I just tried to avoid his attacks so he wouldn't kill me.I just found you again beloved I just can't lose you. Buffy has to trust me and believe the events that I tell her about. That I never meant to hurt him, that he came after me.How could he die?Buffy has to believe me or it might as well be me on that floor…dead *

-Ring-Ring

"Buffy it's for you.It's Angel?"

I run to the phone, in my robe, because I just came out of the shower.

"Angel if this is what you call staying low…"

I didn't even get to finish that thought.I just hear the panic on the other end.

"What's wrong Angel you sound strange?"

Silence follows…Dead silence…

"Buffy…do you trust me?"

To be continued


	5. Happily Ever After

# HAPPILY EVER AFTER

Written by Twinstar

Disclaimer:All characters belong to Joss

This is the last chapter of what has turned out to be my "A Modern Fairytale" series.This follows Trust Me.

Thanks to all those who gave me feed back, they are the ones responsible for this story.This is dedicated to Matt who believes I could do anything.

I have included a passage from a fellow B/Aer.I don't remember exactly were I have seen it.I thank that person in advance.

Angel has seemingly killed Riley. Will Buffy understand and forgive him?

Please send me feed back.I NEED and CRAVE feedback. [twinstar_dust@hotmail.com][1]

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What!?

I was just on cloud nine a few seconds ago and now I don't know where I am.I just got off the phone with Angel.It seems as if my ex-boyfriend, who is a vampire with a soul, has killed my current boyfriend Riley.

I just left Angel at his mansion.He just returned from self-exile from Los Angeles, from me.He returned because he realized that I AM his life and that being apart was like denying breath.

I better talk to the gang and see what they say.Oh I know what they will say.Why would you let him back into your life?Why would you go through heartache again?What they don't know and what they can never understand is that no matter what I do, Angel and I are drawn together. I have accepted long time ago that in an odd way that, a slayer and a demon, belong together.

I called an emergency meeting and I met the gang over at the Magic Box.I look at them and the only thing I can say is the truth.

"Okay guys here goes.Angel came back to town last night.I spotted him when I came back from patrol…with Riley.There was major bad vibes when I decided to go with Angel to talk things out.Angel and I talked the night away.We got a lot of things worked out… I decided to go back to him.I was on my way over to see you guys and …talk to Riley but things got all screwed up.Riley never had the patience…he always was the guy of action…"

"Ummm…Buffy why are you talking about Riley as if in past tense?" Willow inquired.Willow has always been quick she has caught on.

"I'm talking past tense because…he's dead.Apparently he went over to the mansion this morning to confront Angel and me when he found out I didn't go home last night.I guess he went ballistic.Angel told me that he tried not to fight but Riley kept going for him.Something happened, Angel's not even sure what…but Riley ended up getting impaled by the stake he brought.The stake he brought so that he could kill…Angel."

"Are you alright?" asked Giles my watcher.

"I shouldn't be but in a strange way I am.I trust Angel and I know what Riley is capable of.Shouldn't I be mad at Angel?He did kill my boyfriend."

"Why was Angel here?"

"He needed me.Darla his sire came back and things happened…to make Angel doubt his true self.After a long road of self-discovery he had an epiphany, me.He needed me."

"How can dead-boy come back and expect you to go back to him when he has wounded you so?" Zander countered.

"Yes he has hurt me but he really did think it was for the best.With the clause in place and everything he didn't want to take chances.It seemed like a no win situation.Day by day it kept getting harder not be 'be' with each other.We knew the consequences and it wasn't fair of either of us.Yes I was hurt but I finally understand and I accept.Zander I was going to tell you that Angel and I are together again but this thing with Riley happened.Now I am here to still say that Angel and I are together again…"

Zander never liking Angel just puts his hands up in the air and turns away.

"Willow can speak to you in private?"

"Sure Buffy anything."

"I have to go and see Angel.He sounded strange the last time I talked to him.Yes it was to tell me what happened…but he sounded afraid.I think he thinks that I do not believe or trust him.I have to go to him he's still in a fragile state.He needs me.But can I ask for a favour?"

"Anything."

"You are the queen of research.Can you find something in these old books?I need a spell or something.There has to be a way out of this clause.Yes I am willing to be with him even if we can't do anything about it but there is no harm in looking."

"Considerate it done."

* * *

I am heading towards the mansion and I'm anxious to reach Angel.He didn't sound too good on the phone.He probably thinks I don't believe him.He should know better, but he has gone through a lot lately.He just recently got back on track with his 'life'.Riley has always acted impulsively and I have to admit that he had always had a sore spot for Angel.He never understood my love for Angel, a vampire, who I'm supposed to be slaying not caring about.I really don't believe anyone really understands the bond Angel and I have I think they just accept.I walk faster; Angel needs to hear from my own lips that I understand.Yes, I'll grieve for Riley; he was a big part of my life.The only regret I have is that I should have let Riley go when I realized that I couldn't love him.He always spoke the words to me but I couldn't bear to say it because for me it wasn't true.How could I love some one when Angel never left my heart?

I finally get to the mansion; the door is unlocked as usual.There is an eerie silence that welcomes me.

"Angel…Angel are you here?It's me Buffy."

Silence…

I look around and I am drawn to the room of the mansion that holds the best and worst memories for both Angel and me.The creaking of the door as I pushed it open is deafening due to the silence.

I spot Angel he is crouched on the floor in a fetal position.A flashback of the time Angel's return from hell goes through my mind.In this very room I sent him to hell… and were he came back to me.

** **

_*How can she believe me?She will not want me now. We already have a mountain high obstacle to get over and I put this between us.We have basically agreed to be together and we still have the limitations of the clause.Yes we can be together but if I ever experienced true happiness I would lose my soul again.How can I let her sacrifice physical fulfilment just to be with me?It is not fair.I shouldn't have come back and burdened her with all this.But …it was so natural to want to be with her.She is my 'everything' she anchors my soul to this lifeless body.Hence she is my 'life'.I have to fight.I must tell her what happened. Buffy will trust and she will believe that I never meant to hurt Riley.No matter how hard the road is… we will be together. *_

"Angel? It's Buffy are you alright?"

"Buffy?You came.I thought you would not have anything to do with me.I thought I had to go to you.I was just trying to gather the strength to see you.To make you understand."

"Come here." I hold out my arms and Angel gets up and walks into my embrace.

"I can't believe that you are here"

"You have to have more faith in me.I do believe what you told me about what happened.I don't blame you.I actual blame myself.This would never have happened if I were truthful to Riley.He never gave me time to explain things…but I should not have been with him in the first place.I was using him and I'm not proud of it.I can never make it up to him but the things that happened were not your fault.WE are still okay.It will take time for me to forgive myself…I am still that girl you left behind but in other ways I'm not.I've grown and I and not in odds with my destiny as a slayer anymore.You have probably changed in ways too.We can find out the differences together.Together we will be strong."

"Yes you have changed.You are not that little girl anymore you are a woman.I do need time to get to know you all over again and you have to get to know me as well.What a fine pair we are."

"We are funny pair aren't we"?

"Buffy something is wrong…?"Angel clutches his chest and fall to the ground.

"Angel…Angel…"

AGGG!AGGG!!!

Angel writhing in pain and I have no idea how I can help.I bend down and hold him in my arms.After what seems like eternity Angel quiets down, he is covered in his own sweat.I run my fingers through his hair and I caress his cheek.Something is different.I can't define it.Oh my God, I can feel him breath.He is warm; I can feel his heat through my fingers.He is alive…

Angel slowly meets my gaze.His eyes are clouded with confusion and then slowly replaced with awe.

"Buffy I am alive."He stares at his hands.He touches his mouth and feels his breath; he holds his chest and feels his heartbeat.He slowly takes my mind and if in slow motion he holds my hand to his chest.He's breathing. I can fell the rhythm of his chest constricting and expanding with air.I can feel the thumping of his heart.THUMP THUMP

"Angel…how can this happen?"

"I have no idea.I'm still in shock.After all this time it has been so long.It feels strange.I can feel my heartbeat, my blood coursing through my body.How did this happen?I am human… and I am yours."

I touch his face, my fingertip tracing every crevice, every line and every feature.I hold his face in my hands and place a gentle kiss on his lips.All the kisses we shared cannot compare to this moment.I am met with warm and pulsing skin instead of the cold hard marble I am use to.This must be heaven…

Answers we need answers.

But nothing matters at this moment but being with Angel and to be surrounded by his warmth.I take his hand in mine and we walk to our future.

Later…we will get our questions asked, much later.

* * * *

I don't think I'll every get use to the idea of Angel being human.He is fast asleep and I just want to look at him, absorb that my dream has finally come true.My beloved is here with me.We just expressed our love in the purest of forms and nothing creepy happened, he is still Angel and he's here to stay.I caress his cheek and I gently place my hand over his chest, I feel his heartbeat and I smile.Now I can rest.Everything is perfect and I am where I belong…with my beloved.

_*When I opened my eyes I couldn't believe that I have an actual heartbeat.I'm no longer cold.Every sensation is new to me as if I am experiencing everything for the first time.I want to experience everything with Buffy, share my life with her.I can't wait to go out in the sun: taste food; make her my wife; have babies; everything is possible.All my dreams have come true.I am no longer afraid of what the future holds. I am where I belong. After wandering the earth for hundreds of years I am HOME, I am whole. *_

Much much later.

"Angel I know you are not use to this but we do need to eat, I'm famished.No matter how much I hate to leave this bliss behind, I need food."

"I know there is so much to take in.I am hungry.I wonder if food tastes the same it did hundred of years ago?"

"You have not tried peanut butter…or better yet chocolate."

"Sounds good.But I have something I want to show you first."

--Ring-Ring

"Oh I better get that.The only person that knows I'm here is Willow.Maybe she has answers for us"

I go over and pick up the phone.

"Hello…Willow I thought it would be you."

"I guess your talk with Angel went well you sound extremely happy."

"You don't know how happy I am.I want to tell you all in person can we meet later?"

"Sure but I think I found something.It might be nothing but I also might be something.I found an old prophecy dating around 725 AD it says:

One born of light but touched by darkness,

One born of darkness but touched by light. 

Two ancient lovers destined to be together since time began.

They are separated only to be reunited throughout history.

Neither death nor time nor the destruction of this very world,

Can keep their souls from each other.

Let all those who try to oppose their union,

Face witness to the light they both create and submit

To their might, to their love,

And to the prophecy that binds them together.

Buffy what do you think?Anything?"

"Wil you are miracle worker.Yes oh yes it explains a lot.Better to show you then tell you.Why don't you get take-out and meet us here at the mansion.Don't forget to bring ice cream.We are going to celebrate.Gather up the rest of the gang as well they want to see this as well.See you all later."

I should have told Willow but I wanted to surprise her. I can't to see everyone's face when they find out Angel is breathing.

"Angel…where are you?I have news."

"I'm in here Buffy.I want to show you something."

I find Angel in the bedroom.His arms are behind his back he is hiding something.

"Angel I have wonderful news Willow found a prophecy and it explains everything…what is behind your back?Why do you have the biggest grin on your face?"

"I want you to have this again…Here" He places a box in my hand. 

I slowly open it and contained in the box is the calaugh ring he gave me long ago.I thought it was lost.When I sent him to hell I left the ring on the floor of this very room.I wanted to let him know in my special way that I was going on with my life.When he came back from hell I searched everywhere for the ring but I couldn't find it.Now after all this time, after all the heartache, after all the healing Angel gives it back to me.

"It belongs on your finger Buffy.I want to start a new commitment with you.Will you be my wife, my partner forever?"

"Yes yes forever" Our lips meet to renew our promise.

Angel and I finally have our dreams come true and who ever thought that a vampire and a slayer could live happily ever after.

THE-END

   [1]: mailto:twinstar_dust@hotmail.com



	6. Epiloge- Catch Me When I Fall

# CATCH ME WHEN I FALL

Written by Twinstar

In response to Cynamin's question of Angel not being entirely perfect.I thought it would be a great excuse of continuing where my series 'A Modern Fairytale' left off.

Angel has his dream come true, he is finally human.When he thought everything was perfect, his past catches up on him.

Some quotes are taken directly from season two.

Please send feed back I love the stuff! [twinstar_dust@hotmail.com][1]

Enjoy!

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

BUZZ BUZZ

I wake up and I feel arms wrapped around me.The quiet movement and soft sigh of my love beside me warms my heart.My heart, that's still so weird for me to say might less think. I can feel the steady beating of my heartbeat and I 'm just in awe.I never realized how much I missed the simple everyday indications of being alive until I felt them again.My body is warm and if I concentrate I can actually feel the blood flowing through my veins, I'll never be cold again.It has been five months since I've turned human again.I'm getting use to the routine of normal 'life'.The simplicity of eating food, oh the heavenly taste of food in my mouth.The feeling of warm sunlight on my face and walking out during the day was the biggest change.I have a lot of adjustments to make considering I haven't been human for over two hundred years.I'm leading such a normal life now.Well, as normal as it's going to get living in Sunnydale; having a fiancée for a slayer; and ex-watchers, a witch, a seer, a werewolf, an ex-demon and a Zander for friends.

I start to caress Buffy's hair and I lightly touch her face.

"Hummm that feels good. Is that a sign that you want to wake up?I can stay in bed forever with you."

"Honey if you still want to go back to sleep go ahead.I just can't get over that I'm here with you and we are going to get married and oh yeah that I have a heartbeat."

"I love that heart beat." Buffy trails a finger down my chest, momentarily stops to feel the thumping of my heart and continues on.

"Hey you know that tickles and gives me goose bumps."

"I love those goose bumps," Buffy starts placing tiny sweet kisses on my chest "I wonder what else I can do…"

"MMMM this is a nice way to start the day." I swiftly pin Buffy down to the bed and devour her mouth in a lingering kiss.Yes this is what I have always wanted and more. Everything is perfect…

* * * * *

Meanwhile in another part of town a bus pulls over and the doors open.A woman steps out and puts her hand over her eyes to shield her eyes from the bright morning sun.

"I am never going to get use to that."

"Miss excuse me miss can I help you with your bags?" The man in charge of the baggage inquires.

"Certainly."

"How long are you staying here in Sunnydale, may I as? Are you here visiting friends or family?"

"I don't know how long I'm staying.I'm here to visit family…my umm father…actually we have some issues to work out."

"Ahh with that accent of yours you must be visiting from England, am I right" With that he walks away to put her luggage onto a chart.

"It's good to be back in good old Sunnydale.I wonder if daddy will be surprised?"

* * * * *

Giles' house

"Well everyone's here with the exception of Zander and Anya so let's get on with the meeting and fill them in later," Giles putting the meeting into order.

"It's pow-wow time." Willow chuckles.

"Buffy how's the vampire situation doing?" Giles asked.

"Nothing spectacular just lowly minions no biggie."

"So all is quiet in the Sunnydale front." Willow interrupts. "I'm getting use this no fighting for our lives bit or saving the earth from total destruction."

"Alright so if nothing important is happening right now, we better start looking for Spike." Giles says adjusting his glasses

"Ahh do we have too.It's been so peaceful here since he disappeared," interrupted Buffy.

"Well I know he is not anyone's favourite person…er vampire but he has helped us in the past and he might be in trouble."

The front door crashes open and a winded Zander stumbles in dragging Anya.

"Guuys…you…won't…believe…who I just saw?"

"Who?" We all asked at the same time.

"Drusilla or an identical facsimile.A dead ringer no pun intended."

"You must be mistaken…it is still sunlight outside unless she is lurking in the shadows," Buffy answers back.

"No no she was out there, in the sunlight.She was walking in the sun like any regular human being.It seriously gave me the wiggins."

"I was afraid of that," Giles interjects.

"When were you going to let us on your little hunch?When we invite her over for a beach party?"

Giles shaking his head and giving an icy glare in the direction of Zander before he continued with what he was going to say.

"I started having my suspicions when Spike suddenly made himself scarce after Angel turned human.I began looking up information in our collection of books.At first I believed that it was just lore, but most of the things we see in movies or read in novels today have a real connection to the vampires we face.There are beliefs that once a sire has reverted back into human form then all of the children he created would do the same as well.It has never happened so therefore it was just a hypothesis…until now."

"Does that mean that Spike is probably human as well?"

"Yes it does.He's probably hanging low because he still has to process what being human again means."I state. "He has always been an highly emotion guy, you should have seen him before …Scratch that I didn't mean to sound so…"

"Vampire-like?" Zander tries to help me out.

"Do you think that either Spike or Drusilla could be harmful in anyway now that they are human?They have souls now right? "Asks Willow.

"I think that Angel is the best person to ask that considering he knew them before they were vampires." Giles turns and looks over to me.

"Well they shouldn't be a problem to others but…to themselves that's another question.I'll go out and look for Dru first because I have a feeling I know were he is holding up.Buffy why don't you and the rest of the gang go and look for Spike."

"Are you sure you want to look for Drusilla by yourself?" Buffy asks.

"Buffy you have to understand, I owe her.I owe both of them so when you find Spike please be gentle.He is probably confused and scared.They are after all innocent in all of this."

"Wow I never would have imagined thinking Spike and Drusilla being innocent," Zander chuckles before we all went our separate ways.

* * * * *

I start walking to the abandoned warehouse were Dru and Spike hid out when they first arrived in Sunnydale and the same place that was half burned down when I was Angelus.I start walking faster because I have a weird feeling in my gut that she needs help.Just when I thought that all the heinous things I did when I was a vampire, when I was Angelus, could be put behind me, I get a jolt backwards.I'm never going to be entirely free from my past I have to learn to live with it.I still can't believe that I was given a second chance in life.I don't deserve it considering all the sins I have committed…but because of love.A love for a slayer, I am no longer a demon of the night but a being of the light again.

I see her; she is staring at the ruins of the building as if in a trace.She turns around before I get a chance to say anything. 

"Angel I knew you would come.You have damned me forever."

"Dru I know I can right the wrongs I have done to you but…you have wronged me as well.The only thing that we can do is to try and separate the lives we live as demons away from our lives now.If we don't, we will never have peace."

"Don't you think I tries that?The things I did when I was a vampire live in me.I can't shake it. I want to kill everyday I try not to subsume into my impulses and it's driving me insane.I remember every single detail; the pain and suffering haunt my thoughts.I can hear all my victims' fears in my head and they are drowning my very essence.Remember what you did to me before you turned me?"

"How can I forget?I have not forgiven myself.You should have come to me sooner once you turned human.I could have helped you."

"How can I come to you when you turned me into a monster, a freak of humanity?Now that I have a soul again I remember everything and there is so much pain.You killed my family; you stalked me until I was insane.I just want to die but do you know what is stopping me Angel?"

"What?"

"Fear.Fear that I won't go to heaven because I do not deserve it.I want to see my family again to hold them and to tell them I'm sorry."

"Drusilla please"

I didn't know what to say to her because she looks so lost, and it's my entire fault.When I turned human I never thought that the ones I turned would become human again as well.The last time I saw Dru I thought I could never forgive her.She was the one that turned Darla back into a vampire but now I just want to hold her in my arms and beg for her forgiveness. 

I take her hand and we head back to the mansion.I know it will be weird for everyone to try to help someone they have been fighting as enemies for so long.But if I know them, they will welcome her with open arms because like me, she's a lost soul that is found again.

Drusilla reminded me of a thought that I didn't want to ponder.Family.I killed my family and I remember it as a hazy dream but it's a memory never the less.When I meet them again, will they still love me, will they forgive me?

* * * * * 

Elsewhere…

"Spike are you here?" Buffy questions and suddenly hears with her slayer hearing a faint inhale.

"Guys he's not here.Why don't you guys go to the mansion and see if Angel's back yet.I have another place to check out and I'll be right behind you."

"Are you sure Buffy?" answers Willow.

"Don't worry if I encounter Spike he will be no match for me now that he's human."

"Okay we will see you later then" Zander says leading everyone back to the mansion.

After they are out of sight Buffy turns the direction of the sound she heard earlier and says, "Spike I know you are there.Why don't you come out?"

"How come you let the others go?"Spike walks out of his hiding place.

"I sensed that you wanted some private time with me and…"

"Oh you and your slayer instincts"

"Actually it's my woman's intuition that needs to take credit this time.After all the issues we aired out the last time we saw each other. I though you would want to be alone with me."

"So you feel sorry for me now?"

"Yes but…"

"Bloody hell." shouts Spike and in a whisper he adds," Has anything changed now that I'm part of the human race again?"

"Umm no.You know Angel has always been the one for me and now that he's human too…"

"I knew that would be your answer but I had to say what I felt if only once.I envy that bloke of yours.He has your undying love and I wish…that you felt just an inkling of that love for me."

"I don't know what to say.I never thought of you like that…Okay but I'll just say this once.Yes I did feel something but it's not like what feel for Angel.It was a twisted form of lust.You ignited that dark feeling that I think everyone has inside themselves and it's something I wanted to remain buried."

"Was it exciting even for a little while?"

"Yes in a way.Thank you for letting me feel that darkness.In your own way you made me a stronger woman.I know the temptations but I never let them control me and it has made me the person I am today."

"I'm not going to say that I like where this is going.Now that I am human again, my soul cries out for you.I just want you to love me."

"Oh Spike I'm so sorry.All of my hatred for you has disappeared and all I want is your happiness.In hindsight I realize now how hard it was for you to confess your love for me when you were still a vampire.It must have killed you, no pun intended, to admit it.Who would have thought a vampire in love with a slayer huh?" Buffy chuckles the last part trying to lighten a heavy situation.

"Yeah what only twice in your lifetime." Spike laughs back.

"So are you okay with this human thing?"

"It's going to take sometime to get use to but now that I have a soul again…anything is possible.I had nightmares for the first couple of nights…about all the things I did when I was a vamp…but it got better when I began thinking of those things as a separate entity."

"I always accused you of being dumb but you are starting to be one of the smartest ones I know.You are going to make it in this world…Spike"

"No, call me William.Buffy I wanted to see you before…I have to leave Sunnydale and all the things that remind me of my former life…mostly you…But I have one request…Can I kiss you good bye… I want that memory in my new human form.Just this once to remember you by."

Buffy takes his face in her hands and slowly kisses his mouth in a bittersweet embrace.

"I will miss you…William.You have been…a good friend."

Buffy turns around and walks away and can't help wondering what might have been.

* * * * *

Later back at the mansion.

"We all have to be quiet.I gave Drusilla a potion so that she can sleep." Willow whispers.

"Did you get in touch with your friend from the council Giles?" Zander looking at the closed door that Dru was behind.

"Yes and she will be here as soon as possible.I hate to ask the council for anything but in this situation they are the best people to help Drusilla and also it will help us better understand what has happened.This information might help us in the future.We might be able to save people turned by killing the source."

"Yes it has been an interesting turn of events.So Buffy are you sure that Spike is alright?" Willow turning her attentions to Buffy and a silent understanding passes through the two close friends.

"William will be okay.It will take time but I agreed with him that it couldn't be done here in Sunnydale.Who knows we might see him again…"

I notice that Buffy says Spike's old name, the one he had before he was a vampire.There was something more between them then she said but I won't press.She had a relationship with Spike…sorry William when I was away in LA.Maybe in time she will tell me why she has a sad look in her eyes whenever she says his name.

"Angel…if Dru and Will are human do you think that Darla's human again as well?" Buffy takes my hand into hers for support.

"I think so.I hope she has found people that can help her.If she is human again…that means she is dying…"

There is silence in the room and I can feel the strength coming from Buffy holding my hand.Without her…I don't know were I would be.I probably would be in the same situation that Dru is in now.

"Angel…"Buffy whispers into my ear," I have a feeling that Darla has someone to take care of her so please so not worry." 

She has never been wrong when it comes to her slayer's six sense.Yes Darla is all right she has to be…

I touch the ring on Buffy's hand.The one I gave to her to show my commitment and my love. "What would I do without you my love?"

"Don't worry you never have to find out." Buffy touches my face and gives me a kiss to seal our promise.

* * * * *

"Why?Why didn't you just attack me when you had the chance?Was it a joke?To make me feel for you and then…I've killed a lot of vampires.I've never hated one before."Buffy says 

"Feels good, doesn't it?Feels simple." I answer back.

"I invited you into my home. And then you attacked my family."

"Why not? I killed mine."

# # # 

"I killed their friends and their friends' children.For hundred years, I offered an ugly death to everyone I met.And I did it with a song in my heart."

# # #

"My mum says I'm cursed.My seeing things is an affront to the Lord.That only He's supposed to see anything before it happens.But I don't mean to, Father, I swear.I try to be pure in His sight and do my penance. I don't want to be a thing of evil," Drusilla confesses.

Posing as a priest I answer back, "Hush child.The Lord has a plan for all creatures.Even a devil child like you."

"A devil…"

"Yes, you're a spawn of Satan, all the Hail Marys in the world aren't going to help.The Lord will use you and then smite you down.He's like that."

"What can I do?"

"Fulfill His plan for you, child.Be evil.Perform evil works.Attack the less fortunate.You can start small: laugh at a cripple.You'll feel better.Just give in…"

"No…I want to be good…I want to be pure…"

"We all do, at first.World doesn't work that way."

# # #

"I did a lot of unconscionable things when I became a vampire.Drusilla was the worst.She was…an obsession of mine.She was pure and sweet and chaste." I confront Buffy.

"You made her a vampire." Buffy responds.

"First I made her insane.Killed everyone she loved, visited every torture on her I could devise.She eventually fled to the convent, and the day she took her Holy Orders, I turned her into a demon."

# # #

Drucilla mumbling incoherently," My mummy ate lemons.Raw.She said she loved the way they made her mouth tingle.Little Anne, her favourite was custard…brandied pears…"

I try to silence her, "Dru…"

"Ssshhhhh. And pomegranates.They used to make her face and fingers all red.Remember little fingers?Little hands?Do you?"

"If I could, I…"

"Bite your tongue!They used to eat.Cake.And eggs.And honey.Until you came and ripped their throats out."

# # # 

"When you become a vampire, the demon takes your body.But it doesn't take you soul.That's gone.No conscience, no remorse…it's an easy way to live.You have no idea what it's like to have done the things I've done, and to care."

# # #

"This one cannot be burned.He is clean." The demon The Judge states.

"Clean? You mean he's…"stutters Spike.

"There's no humanity in him." answers The Judge.

"Angel?" questions Drusilla.

I tell them all, "Yeah, baby, I'm back."

* * * * *

"NO!"

"Angel honey wake up.It's all a bad dream." Buffy says shaking me awake.

"What? What happened?" I jump out of sleep and drenched in my own sweat.

"You had a dream.You have been tossing and turning all night.It must be all the happenings with Drusilla and William."

"You must be right…Buffy please hold me…. "

Buffy sensing that I needed strength just holds me tight and whispers, "No matter what happens I'll always be here for you.I know it must be hard being human again…but I'm here by your side.We all are."

"I think you should start calling me Liam…"

"You have nothing to be ashamed of… you will always be an angel to me regardless of your past.It is not your past you must remember, you have to concentrate on the future.It was another lifetime, that was then this is now.After all the years of angst you endured because you were a vampire with a soul, you just didn't cower away your existence.Instead you fought for the weak and the defenceless.It made you a stranger with the demon world and an abomination to the human one.I have no idea how you were able to survive without belonging.But…you did and you won a second chance, you won your redemption.Even after you gained your humanity, it didn't stop you from continuing the fight over evil.I am so proud of you and mere words can never express what I feel.'

"But… I have done the unspeakable, that can never be erased."

"You must not fight it…just accept and learn.You must live a different life and put everything else behind.It won't be a piece of cake but we are in this together." Buffy looks into my eyes with open devotion and love.No matter what I have done, and I have done unspeakable things to her and her family and friends, she has forgiven me.If she can do that I probably can forgive myself…

"I love you beloved…you always catch me when I fall…"

The sun is breaking over the horizon and we both watch it together…it's a sign of new beginnings.

THE –END

"Redemption is difficult.It takes a long time, and there isn't always a goal in sight.You have to keep trying to do right, and if you make it easy, that's kind of a false hope.The thing about Angel is that even when it doesn't look like there's light at the end of the tunnel, he's going to keep digging, just because that's who he is."

-Joss Whedon

   [1]: mailto:twinstar_dust@hotmail.com



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